Well I think I mostly agree with what you are saying, again I find it hard to answer this question because I feel we don't quite mean the same thing or define things the same way. Not sure when Jesus told us to love others that is what He was thinking, because this Jesus disagreed with people vehemently, told people very hard truths and literally flipped the table of money changers in the temple, yet this was all love.

My only fear with agreeing with your earlier statement (your first message) is perhaps you've had Christians who did not agree with your point of view or told you you were doing something wrong and you've felt judged and then that translated into feeling they were unkind.

So I don't completely know where you are coming from but as a general rule Christians would not always accurately represent Christ because they are human as well, are they then worthy of respect? Well it depends. They have to want your respect like anybody else I think.